“Since 1991, me and my husband has lost one brother each to suicide,
Knut Dagfinn, my older brother, a creative fashion-shop owner, died in 1991.
My dear brother in law, Gunnar, left in 2011, a musician with broad instrumental skills.
Two men, both intense passionate involved with music.
They influenced our direction and platform of understanding music.
In 1991, when my brother left, the society was filled with shame,
and the subject was avoided, no one talked openly about people committing suicide.

With our upbringing, from childhood to adulthood, music was
a «patch»  for dysfunctional families.

It took 5 years to find a inner forgiveness, and move away from the guilt
about could have done so much more for my brother.
Suicide relatives struggles heavely with, many forms of guilt. I finally could
let go of the burden, about the worst loss, at that time in life, was over. The heavyest job
was to forgive myself for letting my brother down. I didn know back then, that
we had another brother on the same path, 10 years later.

With very little openness, and deep shame, my grief felt very consist
and lonely, and mostly about struggle with selfforgiveness.
The most effective help appeared when the pin hits the vinyl, and music
floated out in the room, and I
reached a magic place,
where your insides* felt releief and comfort.»

«I often use the «Moon method»,
especially in the winter, and I highly
recommend it. It is not crucial that you
choose Beach Boys (My first chioce is
calm King Crimson,
but many other bands and genders work as
music therapy. The important thing is
that you resort to the music you want
to listen to). In other words, music picked
out with the heart, not necessarily by reason.
And then…let the music «wander into, or
through you.»

Experience says that it never takes more than five minutes before
the mood starts rising again. Should you get a relapse, just repeat the
treatment as much as needed.

Let’s not get hung up on the concept of quality. There is music for every
occasion, and there is good music in every genre. What is incomprehensible
or bad for some may be wonderful for others. That’s why I do not smile at people
who find joy in what intellectuals characterize as bad music. One of the worst things
that can happen to you is to know that the music you like is not worth
listening to. Let it be very clear: All music that you like and that gives you
something is worth listening to.

Brian Wilson has his own explanation for why music in itself has a healing power,
and why it is so important to listen to music. He says “The best music is the one
that gives you the feeling of being loved. Music that helps and heals.
The explanation makes sense, and so did Keith Moon.

(Different guiltissues rests heavily on the shoulder of those left behind,
with suicide loss, an often need to seek proffesional help)

Music is medicine and a hiding place for helpless grief, and there si not a
chance for a dangerous overdose at all.

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